Gladly return your money!

-----Original Message-----
From: Gareth Cook

To: Bill Young
Sent: Mon, 17 Nov 2008 7:38 pm
Subject: Annie

I need to find out to whom our warranty on Annie runs. While she is a very good bird-finder, we think we have a warranty claim based on the fact that she is just too smart. I know that sounds like a favorable attribute, but in her case it may not be. Some time ago, she was tearing up something expensive in the house, so Janie decided to give her a chew bone and put her outside. Not being familiar with dog training, Janie did not realize that the dog would connect the destruction with getting a chew bone. Not good. Now you may see her running through the house with some prized possession of ours, glancing at us to see when the chew bone will appear. I have had sleep-depriving dreams in which Annie has commandered a whole cup of pens and is splintering them on the rug in hopes to draw our attention. It usually does, but too late to avoid major destruction.

Were I not a putative quail hunter (and I trust that the second life will free me from this bondage), I would make the warranty claim and rid myself from this creature that by sheer force of personality can make one think this behavior is cute and endearing. Alas, she is saved by being the best quail worker I have ever hunted with. If a person had 6 of her, he could hunt all day anywhere with anyone in any conditions or cover and be nothing but covered in glory. Ed Small said the other day that he thought (when we first hunted with Annie together) that she would never run big enough. I pointed out that Annie was then 4 months old and that I never had any such qualms As you predicted, she will "run to the cover" and if the cover is far away, you better get on your horse. Ed is now duly impressed. Our 4 year old grandson, Nathaniel, who knows that I go quail hunting, informs anyone who asks, if I am not in attendance, that I am probably out "searching for quail." My searches would probably not continue without Annie.

Since you are among the few that would understand this dog admiration (though conditional as it is), and since Annie and I owe all of her abilities (I'm not charging you with her criminal tendencies around the house) to you and your breeding program, I knew you would not object overmuch to this rant about a fine, fine dog. By the way, I think Annie is in the best shape, body-wise, I've ever seen her. I don't know exactly why.

Your demented bird-chasing friend,

Gareth
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From: Bill Young
To: Gareth Cook
Sent: Mon, 17 Nov 2008 8:16 pm
Subject: Horrible Annie

Gareth, I feel horrible about the terrible problems you are having with this animal from our breeding that is obviously creating major havok within your home environment . I fully understand your dilemma and want to assure you that the Lamont guarantee of "full return of the purchase price" remains well within the stated time limits ("so long as she is alive") ... so please ship her back to us ASAP and the return payment will be in the mail immediately. Incidentally, I am headed for my first hunt at Dos Jefes next week so please be sure she arrives before Sunday. If this is a problem ... I will be glad to charter a flight for her! Whatever it takes to make you happy, and see that she is here in time for that first hunt. Actually, I can go ahead and send you the refund now, in advance, if that will make it easier for you. Or, I can actually wait til monday to leave if that is better......whatever it takes to make me (sorry) ...to make YOU happy! Do I get the Garmin GPS also? I know she's accustomed to it! It might make her feel more at home. Sorry my friend ....(whee)!

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